Wednesday, March 24, 2010

on logistics and annoyingness

Logistics:A few people asked about how our busy schedule actually works, so I decided to demystify that for ya'll. If you wonder how I can train for a marathon while working full time and raising 2 kids, you have to remember that a) I'm a teacher, and b) Sam is a teacher. We have the same schedules, and that is rare and makes the 2nd half of each day pretty flexible. Teaching also means we have the summers to rest and recharge.

I feel very weird writing out our schedule for you to read as if it is so interesting, but the fact is, I'm curious about how other families do the day-to-day thing too, so I'm going to carry on as requested:

On a typical school day...
I wake up at 4:45, and before you freak out about that, I do that only so that I have a little time to myself in the morning that is totally quiet, not because I have to.

I take a shower, go downstairs, make coffee and breakfast, and sit down with my laptop to read blogs, email, facebook etc. I go upstairs at 6:00 to dry hair, finish getting ready, wake up Sam and the kids. Skyler gets herself dressed with the clothes I laid out the night before, and Reed runs around naked and shrieks until we wrangle him into pants and a shirt. Next is my least favorite part of the day when I have to find matching socks in the laundry basket for each kid. We all go downstairs, Sam gets breakfast ready for the kids (to take in the car, usually a bagel) and we find matching shoes and coats and leave at 6:45. I take Reed to daycare, Skyler to school, and I get to work by 7:30. These times are the exact same, within 2 minutes, every morning. I'm kind of a robot when it comes to the morning schedule.

Before Sam leaves for work, he cleans the whole house. Kitchen, dishes, makes beds, generally tidies everything.

Next, I go to work and Sam goes to work. At school, we teach English all day, and during any downtime we have, we plan and grade papers. I've been teaching for 10 years now, so I have gotten very efficient at planning and grading. I am faster, more streamlined and less anal than I used to be, so I get a ton done during lunch and study halls. You should also remember that I adore being in my classroom with my students, and my whole day is filled with laughter and creativity and books and banter. If I don't have a meeting, I leave work at 2:30 and go pick up the kids.

We all meet up at home around 3:30. That's when things get a little trickier. Mondays and Wednesdays, I go for my run around 4 and get back in time for Sam to go to swimming at 6. Tuesdays we have Skyler's swim lessons and then we all go to Family Swim. Thursdays, Sam picks up the kids after school and I do my run around 3 and then go home in time for Sam to go to swimming at 4:30. Friday is a rest day for both of us when we usually have an early dinner together and then veg out/ crash.

In the late afternoon/evening, one of us cooks for the kids, and then while Sam is at swimming, I cook our dinner while I pack lunches and set up the coffee for the next morning. Upstairs, I give the kids a bath while I set out clothes for the next morning. Then we play and/or watch a video. I get the kids ready for bed, read to them, and then Sam gets home and reads them each a story. We tuck and cuddle and kiss kids goodnight. And then we sit down for dinner. Or sometimes I eat without him if I'm too hungry and Sam eats when he gets home. And then we hang out until I go up to bed to read and then fall asleep.

Saturdays, I do a long run in the morning and he does something with the kids and always cleans the house. He swims from 11-1. Afternoons we spend together as a family or whatever. Sundays, I take the kids in the morning, either to church or out and about, and then in the afternoon, he takes the kids to family swim while I grocery shop, get other stuff done, grade papers, etc. Sundays we have a big family dinner, and then we start over again. And that's the routine!

How I find time to run? That's easy: I need to. And also, Sam is waaaaay more obsessed with and talented at swimming than I am with running, so he gets it. I don't get grief from him for needing time to run. Before I was a runner, I was a chubbier, more anxious, and more tired. Now, I'm happier and my quads looks good. It's a no brainer.

How I find time to blog? That's easy too: I sneak it in. I have been writing this blog long enough now that I am crafting blog posts in my head almost constantly. It takes me a few minutes to actually write them after they've been swimming around in my head all day.

I don't really watch TV anymore (with one exception... read on), and I read less than I used to during the school year, and Sam and I have to plan dates to really get some time alone, so those are the things that are sacrificed.

Nancy asked: "Do you ever annoy each other? Does it ever feel like too much?" And I laughed for a half an hour. I mean, not only does my husband really annoy me sometimes (love you, babe), but I definitely annoy Sam. I'm wicked stubborn and can't ever admit that I'm wrong (I'm usually not), and I can be bossy and snippy. Should I list all of the ways that Sam is annoying? That may not be a good move.

But if you want an example, he just walked into the living room where I'm trying to watch American Idol, and he is like: "Oh my god, wow! Have they narrowed it down to the top 85 yet?" and then after someone sings, he'll say: "I don't know, dawg, that was pitchy for me." That is so annoying. He also drinks milk out of the jug, eats all the snacks I buy for the kids, and he is unnecessarily uptight about how clean the garage needs to be.

Yes, we are both annoying to each other, and yes, sometimes it does feel like too much and sometimes I go to bed at 7:30 because I've had it. But I will say that our schedule works well (after much fine-tuning) and we share all the important things: love of home and good food, the need for exercising, love of each other, the need to do our own thing, and love of our very hilarious kids who keep every minute interesting.

Did I tell you that Reed flushed a match-box car down the toilet last night?
So, we need to go figure out what to do about that.


Michelle said...

Ohhhh please can I borrow Sam to teach Todd to be unnecessarily tidy about OUR garage? Oh wait, we don't have a garage. OK, maybe Sam can teach Todd to be unnecessarily tidy about our basement/playroom/storage area... anything! You are a blessed woman!!

And yes about the matchbox car... I have a friend who came home to 3 inches of poopie water in her kitchen because her son did that.

OK really it was Miranda on Grey's Anatomy but still... you watch them so much they start to be your friends in you head. No?

Nancy said...

Oh Emilie, I love you for writing this wonderful long explanation and for sharing your schedule! I realize now that one of your great mysteries is the same as my sister's: you both were clever enough to find--and marry--that elusive creature, Hewhocleansus Sapiensus. I did not [but I love you, babe!]. Also, you revealed what I had guessed: minimal TV and early to bed/early to rise. for thought. As for the john/matchbox, good thing Reed is so darn cute.
Seriously, you should put together one of your famous videos following Reed around doing his cardio in various settings (the house, the pool, the woods, the grocery store...) and submit it to the Biggest Loser. I bet they'd call you. Maybe they'd fly him in for a special last chance workout guest trainer spot!

Laurie in Maine said...

"Before Sam leaves for work, he cleans the whole house. Kitchen, dishes, makes beds, generally tidies everything."

When does Sam School begin?
Please enroll my husband.

Alan said...

Okay, Sam needs to ease back. He's raising the bar for the rest of us to uncomfortable levels.

Carver Fam said...

Once again, and for public record, I will say that Sam annoys Emilie as an act of love and because it is so damn easy. I have watched him take the last bite of your pizza, make fun of your favorite shows and listen while he painfully describes to me how to make salsa in your kitchen while you groan and roll your eyes and he gets more and more detailed and over the top.

This is his love. He is almost like a school boy who doesn't know how to tell a girl he likes her so he pulls her ponytails.

And you can't admit when you're wrong? That must be a marital trait, not a friendship trait...

Kirsten said...

I loved reading this! I am up in the middle of the night because Niko is sleeping sideways in our bed and his head was pushing me out. Our windows are all cracked open and I can't believe it's not freezing. I am sneaking in blog reading time even though I am going to pay for this by the middle of the day!

Besides the difference that Ran works long days and I am home with the kids and running around before teaching a night class a couple of nights a week, one obvious thing I noticed about your schedule is that you don't use tv to wind down in the way that we do.

Though we don't watch tons (in comparison to who, I don't know), we do have 1-1 1.5h each night where we are watching something before bed. I almost always fall asleep on the couch and I have to really wonder if this is the best way to wind down.

It's true that we really get into some of these shows and we talk about them, but it's not that social, why does it feel more social to watch together rather than blog or read together? Not sure. Why do I feel panicky at the thought of not watching these shows that we think we love? Not sure. Addicted? Really is fun?

Anyway, reading schedules is interesting to me, so thanks!

ambinlovewlove said...

Sam's side comments on AI may have been annoying but HILARIOUS! Then again my husband and I are fans of side commentary.

Dan is the same way about the kitchen the way Sam is about the I'd rather scrub the toilet than do dishes.