Tuesday, August 31, 2010

thank you and I'm sorry

I really didn't intend to make so many people cry today. I really didn't. I mean, I didn't even whip out the "motherhood is like having your heart walk outside your body" line. I could have made it much, much worse. But thank you, thank you, thank you for all of the sweet comments and words of support. I felt the love today for sure.

So, let me tell you and show you how the day went.

In true Brand-woman form, I got her to school 30 minutes early. I just couldn't pace around the house anymore and we were all ready, so we just went and walked around the school until we were let into the classroom. She was nervous, and I could tell because she was sighing a lot (I do that too when I'm nervous), but she was putting on a brave face.

I, on the other hand, got really worked up and nervous as the time came for me to go.  I helped her settle in, helped her follow the very-organized 6-step morning routine (God bless Kindergarten teachers), and sat next to her at her table for a minute.  Once a few other kids were also settled around her, I stood up and said goodbye.  She gave me the "I'm about to lose it" face, and grabbed my arm.  I pulled away quickly, said "I love you" and walked out.  Didn't look back.

Once I pulled myself together out front, I may or may not have cupped my hand around my eyes and peered into her classroom window three separate times.  It cannot be confirmed.  But in the event that I had done that crazymother behavior, it might be true that Skyler was happily working with clay at her table and there was nary a tear.

I waited for Sandi and Suzanne who needed some hugs in the parking lot after leaving a teary Ella, and then I went about my intentionally very busy day.

Rushed to work, got everything ready for MY first day with students, tomorrow, including getting everything organized and copied for the week, classroom arranged, syllabus written.  Raced home, walked Jackson, changed into running clothes, went to the gym for a quick 3 miles and then all of a sudden it was time to go get her.

When I left the gym, it was this many degrees.
Is this not insane?

I went back to Skyler's school and joined the throngs of moms and dads waiting outside the doors, 3 layers deep, cameras at the ready.  We were the paparazzi and we were waiting for our star sightings.  Finally, after I had compared notes with every parent near me about what a big day this was, the doors opened and a hush fell among the crowd.  "They're coming!  They're coming!"

  I knew the whole day would be written on her face.  And it was.

She.  had.  a.  great.  day.

Soon came Ella.  This is how her day went.
Skyler was smiling and smiling and smiling, and all of a sudden I noticed that one her teeth looked crooked and I touched it.  Not only was this her very first day of Kindergarten, but she has her FIRST LOOSE TOOTH!  If that doesn't beat all.  This turn of events took all the attention, and I could not get her to tell me about school.  She was all about that loose tooth.

We found our friend Jason.  "I HAVE A LOOSE TOOTH!" 

When I got her in the car, I said:  "I really want you to tell me everything about school.  HOW was it?"

And then from the backseat, I heard this:
"There is a round mat for stories and calendar time and we are all in the green zone right now and we get green stars for being good and you know what?  if we are good and get a lot more green stars then we get a special prize and for lunch I wished I could get hot lunch but your lunch was good and in the winter we are only going out to the playground 2 times but right now we get to go out three times and on tuesdays we have gym and on fridays we have library but if your friend is climbing higher than you feel comfortable with on the playground then you don't have to go as high as them and I made two special friends but I can't remember their names and i can bring cupcakes in for my birthday and you know what?  you never want your clothespin to go down, you always want it to point up because that means you were good for the day."

She kept going, and it was like a really good story on NPR becasue I ended up sitting in the driveway listening to her still talking and talking and talking.

Soon, Sam and Reed got home.

"I have a LOOSE TOOTH!  And you know what?"  etc.  etc.  etc.

When she was done telling Sam, she called my mom.

Thanks for thinking of us today.  You've done good work.  Now, I have some Kindergartner snuggling and some tooth-wiggling to do.


M. Louise Cunningham said...

Just Precious!!!

Michelle said...

How sweet! I'm laughing and crying all at the same time. I didn't get to comment earlier but thought of you all day.

yeah for your first loose tooth Skyler!!!

Helen said...

Yay Skyler, Yay Manharts! Here's to many more happy kindergarten days and exciting firsts! xo

Nancy said...

Emilie, you should never apologize for touching our hearts the way you do! It's wonderful to be reminded of the excitement and newness of kindergarten. I think the Markses are all feeling a bit jaded this year with everyone in the same school they were in last year and Alan just desperate to get them OUT OF THE HOUSE! I thought of you today as I drove away while Mad and Jer waited for the bus and our across-the-street neighbors waited with their 1st day kindergartener. He looked calm; they waived nervously!

Angela said...

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!! So relieved and happy for you guys!

PS - my drop off went soooo much better today!!!! Thanks for the kind and encouraging words yesterday.

Megan Boyle Lovett said...

Emily, what a fun post. Yes, I am sending Mitch my 6 year old to kindergarten this year and looking forward to our family night tonight. I do have to laugh at your odometer picture though. Were you really going 65 miles an hour and taking the picture of the temperture? I was glad to see Skylar's look of pure happiness after school and I am looking forward to Mitch's response too. Thanks Megan Boyle Lovett

Emilie@onemominmaine.com said...

Okay, I guess I'm busted on the driving photo, Megan. BUT... I did not put my eye to the camera, just held it up to shoot it. I know, I know. Good luck with Mitch! So nice to hear from you!

Eileen said...

I'm crying, too! What a great first day. Love it.

Carver Fam said...

I am so proud of our girls.

And you are right, that picture in the post below undid me. I think I am trying to purge all the tears out. But damn if I dont' keep making more.

Let's hold off on planning that joint graduation party just yet, ok?

Paige said...

I want you to write my life's story for me. You writing is miraculous--it has me laughing, crying, and then back to laughing again.

BTW--good job on not being caught looking in the window. It was a necessary crime of sanity, I tell you.

Oh. One more thing-your Skyler looks just like your mom in those pictures!

Elizabeth said...

Hey, thanks, Paige,

I take that as a distinct compliment

Kirsten said...

Beautiful! And I LOVE her news report. I mostly heard about the baseball game happening in the cafeteria during lunch (a divided room where gym class was happening while the KDG and 1st grades were eating lunch.